Lisa and I NOT on the Same Page

This question came up during my first-thing-in-the-morning meditation. What am I holding on to? It came as a response, I think, when I was thinking of stuff I needed to continue to clear. Last night for whatever reason the name Cheri Melchione came up, she of course, was my old girlfriend from almost 28 years ago back when I was still living in my Hacienda Heights condo. We were together for one summer and it ended up not working out because she had lots of emotional issues to the point where she would express suicidal thoughts sometimes. The funny thing was that somehow I linked her personality to Lisa's. Wow. Was Cheri narcissistic like Lisa though? Maybe not, but she was an emotional vampire to be sure. Anyway I Googled her and there she comes up, in an interview about a legal issue with a bank and her house. Real estate problems. I remember thinking same old stuff from when we were together though I don't remember much about specifics. I remember her writing me about money I owed her and I remember just sending her a check to simply cut ties clean instead of wrangling about it. Not quite so easy with Lisa specifically because we have a child. Look at that picture...he's the most delightful child. Happy. Even with his parents divorced. We do not always see eye to eye and definitely are not on the same page sometimes. Tonight Lisa tells me she contacted Johnnie's school since she is going ahead and doing the trip this weekend to see Sharon, Balwan, and Varsha. Which would then cut into Monday, the first day of school for Johnnie. I thought I told her that was not a good idea and that I felt she should change her plans to make sure Johnnie does not miss the first day. But here she is ignoring all that apparently and moving forward with her plan. Totally a case of her feeding her need to social connection but also at the expense of what is going on with Johnnie. That is typical Lisa of course. She simply forgot to check when Johnnie's schedule was. She was simply thinking it was just another Monday. And it is those lapses in future planning that just drives me crazy. Because I, of course, am the opposite. This was simply a case of Lisa being Lisa as usual only this time I felt much more strongly about it than usual.

Anyway, there was no resolution other than we agreed to disagree. And then I gave Johnnie a healthy dose of why I felt that he should not be missing the first day of school. Will it matter in the long run? I don't think so, but I was SERIOUS about at least shaking Lisa's awareness off its usual perch of lala-lala, everything is just fine when it comes to her social plans. I wanted to at least make her aware that though she rarely sees past herself, her choices has consequences. And I wanted to make her aware that though I do NOT care what she chooses for herself, I care a GREAT DEAL when those choices affect Johnnie. And I will not hesitate to tell her in no uncertain terms when I don't agree with them. That will have to do this time, though my ego was definitely doing its suffering thing and control thing and fear thing and I had to do some cleaning and clearing about that. It made for an unusual evening. Johnnie and I even found ourselves at Boba Time getting udon for his dinner because of course Lisa would go to Nikki's and drop him off around 7:30 PM already and he hadn't eaten yet. Again I don't give a shit whether she eats or not. I care a great deal if Johnnie does or doesn't. On the schedule I have. Yes I am aware it's a control thing. Yes I need to get past that too. All in all it was a typical Monday other than I worked more than usual because now I have to address all these things in the IS Audit that were nitpicked AND I had to approve more than a dozen invoices today. What was usual? I still managed to do 15,000+ steps today. AND 136 active minutes. Back to normal is right. No more bleeding stuff, but I did have to pee a lot today. Maybe because I was also trying to hydrate all day long, this being a hot day and all. I also did notice that I do feel better when I have more carbs than what I had been doing in the last month. Like I had a full spaghetti Turkey bolognese plate. Made a little rice to augment lentils at lunchtime. All good, I'm still checking in normal with blood pressure readings. So other than the blip that was the Lisa interaction, everything was good. I have Johnnie now the rest of the week and it IS the last week of summer vacation for him. Last day of camp too. I was at least really glad to see him especially with his new haircut and all, he no longer has this mop on top of his head LOL. And putting aside Lisa making him miss the first day of school, I too am looking forward to the new school routine coming up fast.