It's the last day of August and summer doesn't seem to want to fade away just yet. In fact, it had been a pretty mild summer so far, and sometimes it had even been a lot cooler than usual during the evenings. But not today. From the moment we went outside, you could tell it was going to be a hot day and all weather reports indicated this was going to be one of the hottest weekends of the year to date. For me today, it didn't really mater that much since it's the day I go in to the FRB. I even thought about not doing that at all. After all I had all this leftover salad from last night that I could eat for lunch and I did have a 2-hr CCALAC meeting right after lunch. But then again I thought I might as well go in show my face and use the gym. I did manage to have a meeting with the data team, or at least Shilpa and then I did my sets at the pullup bar and then I went on home by noon. And I was eating the huge salad topped with shrimp. It would have been nice to kick around and have another nap in the middle of the afternoon. But not today. Instead I was stuck in the co-chairs meeting that CCALAC holds once a year to talk about challenges and such. I held my tongue mostly and didn't really make any comparisons between them and the other collaborative we belonged that was far more successful, which would be OCHIN. They ARE doing the best they can with their resources. Being a co-chair I contributed when I can though I could sense myself being a bit more confrontational and that San also triggers me the way I would someone like Lisa. More on that to come as it turned out.
So the plan was to pick up Johnnie and take him to Lisa' house for Spanish class. Especially since she had apparently called in sick today because of some cold or other. You will forgive my skepticism with all these illnesses she seems to be suffering from. Or should I say claim to be suffering from. In my mind, she would rather be sick of something because that is part of the identity she has bought into. I know she got diagnosed with MS almost a decade ago. But there remains a disconnect between her activities, her capabilities, her prognosis and diagnosis and her symptoms. Today she apparently went to see Dr Deutsch to see about her recent illness, which turned out to be... a cold. Same old cold Johnnie is suffering from. Not that one shouldn't stay home if they have a cold. If you don't feel well, you don't feel well and you should stay home if you feel like it. But that is NOT Covid and it isn't life threatening in the least. For Lisa, it is one more of a series of events today that she has bunched together that ended up setting her off. While we were doing Johnnie's Spanish class, the original plan of making me steak salad seemed to be off the table. And so right after the class, I went off to my apartment to make Johnnie some spaghetti and then get myself dinner from Chipotle. What a total waste of time. And when Johnnie and i started eating, Lisa had already been set off. It was the plants that the painters trampled over. And the grass that she forgot to turn the auto sprinklers on, because the ADT security guy was working on it. It was this, it was that. No end to the supposed problems in her life isn't it? And now she is vocally and angrily wondering why she even has a house <uh YOU wanted it!!>, why she is spending so much <uh, sucks to be YOU don't it??>. There was nothing I could say that wouldn't result in me getting yelled at. Even Johnnie recognized that. His remark was that we should finish dinner so we could get out of there. Which is exactly what we did. I did the dishes and pretty much ignored Lisa and her tantrum. I don't wish to participate at his, or any other time. And so Johnnie and I went back to the apartment and relaxed in the hot tub. THAT is more like it! We shook off the Lisa effect and had a perfectly normal rest of the evening. Goodbye August. At least I will remember August in that I normalized back from traumatic energies from end of July. And tomorrow, it's MY birthday!!
So tonight is Back-to-School Night at Mar Vista Elementary. The last time we were part of this was TK Back to School Night. A full 3 years ago and well before the pandemic. This is the session where the teachers meet parents for the first time and talk about the year ahead in terms of the classroom kid's learning journey. I can still remember one of the parents getting up and saying 'I hope these kids become lifelong friends'. I will admit it is pretty cool to see Johnnie's classroom and all the work he has done in all of 2 weeks of school. He had a self portrait (see pic) and an "I am" poem. It struck me that he wrote "I am Chinese and I am smart". Kid knows who he is that is for sure. By all accounts he is very active in class, and that the class is full of advanced readers and that they need to learn to be still/quiet for 5 minutes. LOL. Good luck with that one. I will say that his strong connection with his Chinese identity is something that creates a little anxiety with me. Because he is MY son and I am not Chinese so I see it as a division. I feel like Darth Vader having to assert myself: "I am your FATHER". But I also know that's just MY insecurities playing out. I love this boy more than anything. And I also know HE loves me back just as strongly. When I picked him up from STAR after the meet-and-greet you could hear him all throughout the school: "DAD!" "DAD!" And I brought him back to the classroom where Lisa was still meeting with his teacher. He seems bored with 2nd Grade Math... so we agreed to up the level of his CGI problems by changing the numbers so they are more difficult. And by making him show how he got to the answer. Seems like a priority with learning now. Process is more important than the result. No blindly learning one method and cranking out the algorithm. I'm willing to work within that framework so Johnnie can show his teacher how advanced he can be.
This morning I decided to do something different. I decided that Johnnie would scooter to school and I would walk. I get to have my steps done and Johnnie gets to ride his scooter. And we got there before 8 AM even. Look at the pic of him on the scooter. So cute is that! Already a great start for the day. So last week I dealt with that snafu with the Frontier installation. Maybe it was the fact that I had to go to Westlake that I didn't want to do and then had to come back blah-blah-blah that caused what ended up being an unproductive day. Today the Frontier guy came back and it was 100% different. Even when the Leasing office providing little help with getting the electrical room open for the Tech guy, I chance ran into Hugo our maintenance guy who DID open the electrical room. Bottom line was that he did his thing inside of 8 minutes and within the hour my NEW internet connection was completed! He got done by 10 AM. He got done so early I even had time to walk the dog, have my IS Team Meeting, AND catch up with my journal entries before leaving for Westlake North. I committed to going there for the afternoon at least. What I did forget was that Laker tickets went on sale today but even then I managed to snag 3 tix for the Knicks game in March. I am sure Johnnie will enjoy the seats behind the basket. Last week I had such a terrible time with the Internet at Westlake North. No such issues today. It was like the day was a complete 360 of what went on Monday. All the outcomes I wanted, I got. And with ease too. Tells me that I am in much better alignment with the Universe.
So I stuck around WN for the aftrnoon and then went home in time to change and walk over to the Mar Vista Back to School Night. And then afterwards, we all went to Pitfire Pizza for dinner. Of course Lisa would have her ounce of drama, this time a salad that she ordered but forgot to ask for the dressing on the side. And then I had to be the one to ask for a replacement salad, and she didn't like that one either LOL. On the drive back she did give me a glimpse of where her thinking was when she mentioned having been first diagnosed with MS in 2013. The doctor told her then that she was likely to develop a disability in 10 years. Guess what? It's almost been 10 years since. Could it be that she is anticipating developing some disability? And when nothing is forthcoming she is creating dis-ease in her own body to fulfill her own shitty prophecy? Power of the mind I say. How can I help her with this if she continues to negate her own Power? I remind myself that you must first BE the example if you're going to get others to follow. I have to focus on MY thinking. In the meantime, we did manage to have a dinner night out and Johnnie simply ignored whatever Lisa was doing by wolfing down his cheese pizza. I must admit I ate way too much. Much more than when we were here last in the spring. Back then I ate a mushroom pizza and Brussel sprouts. Today I ate linguini bolognese like I used to. And most of Lisa's salad that she didn't want to eat. And then off we went home. Another early night tonight. I'm going to take advantage of Johnnie being in the house so I get some decent sleep. Besides, I felt tired tonight. And anxious. No doubt a projection of Lisa's energy. I do know how to release all that now. Because looking at the day, I had a really REALLY good day.
This week already shaped to be a good one simply because it is a short week for me, followed by another short week next week for Labor Day weekend. I just get a 4-day weekend because I took a birthday day off too. Oh yeah, it's my birthday week this week as well. Still, I was up at 7 AM and doing my walk outside so I can get to 5000 steps before I even head in to work. Yes, for the 2nd week in a row, I'm headed for a 2-day stint at Westlake North to babysit. I don't mind it this week particularly because it is such a short week. I had already finished my first set of steps, gotten showered, and gotten dressed ready to go... when I got a ping on TEAMS that Nyree was already at Westlake North taking care of a staff situation. <situation? what staff situation?>. Anyway, that meant I didn't have to go in to Westlake North at all today! SWEET! The day just got 10 times better already! Since I had done my timesheet approvals AND the HRSA survey stuff this weekend and well into last night, I was actually done with all my morning work. I can just sit and chill. And catch up on the meditation I didn't do this morning. And so I ended up having a perfectly chill work day actually the like of which I hadn't seen in the past few Mondays. I watched some YouTube videos, particularly one from Aaron Abke about the ego, this as I sift through information and learn more about my Shadow Self, to learn more about being able to move easily into the realities and outcomes that I want. Today, I wanted to have an eezy-peezy day. And I didn't even articulate what that meant actually... but somehow the outcome that I want was to stay home, chill with learning stuff in the morning, make myself a nice lunch - which today turned out to be the spinach/kale flatbread I bought from Sprouts yesterday, take a nap in the afternoon <which lasted an entire hour actually> and then get to 10,000 steps before 5 PM. Done, done, and done! I actually felt pretty refreshed in the middle of the afternoon heat while doing some walking and by the way while talking to the latest connection I had on Match.com. A lady in Brea named Candace who is actually from Maui. Well, at least my connections are actually legit this go-round. We talked on the phone for a good half hour actually and it was very promising. We'll see how I can manage the going-out-this weekend thing...
And so of course the next phase of Monday is the Johnnie pick-up. Lisa already called and asked me to come get him at 7 PM, which gave me time to walk to El Pollo Loco and have dinner too. I hadn't had this double chicken tostada bowl in months. And although I am still watching what I eat, I ok'd myself to have more meat. I just want to straight up avoid sugars, minimize carbs as much as I can and eat more greens. That should keep me in balance for a while right? I haven't noticed my weight even ticking up, nor my BP levels. All good. I went to Lisa's at 7 PM to pick up Johnnie and mom and son were in the kitchen whipping up a dessert. Smores such as it were. I politely ignored the fact that he wasn't ready to go yet, and I realize that Lisa is merely milking every minute she can with him. Just as I would. I even brought in her garbage cans for her. Hey she did have the day off and by her own account got a nice, restful day in herself. I did stick around for a bit and chatted and then while she was trying to get us all tickets to the Angkor Wat exhibit for this weekend at the Cali Science Center, that's when I took the cue to go. She didn't need us for that didn't she? It was already 7:45! AND I had already sat down and have half a smore. <See what I mean about avoiding sugars entirely? I had milk chocolate. i could almost feel my blood sugar spike. Guess I'll have to make up for it and telling myself just this once is ok>. Once home we immediately go on our weekday routine. Johnnie this time started to watch the Magic School Bus. And even reminded me it was milk time already. Yes he was right. It was already 8 PM. For some reason though, I felt a bit tired tonight. I didn't do anything out of the ordinary really, not even getting to 15,000 steps and 140 active minutes well before 8 PM would do that. I think I'm feeling effects from all the healing videos I had been binge watching in the last couple of days. I thought about the episodes of supposed kidney stones, or bladder stones, even the bleeding episodes from a month ago. Yes it was chaos brought about by my Shadow Self. But then again could it be that I am simply purging before a healing took place? That's what happened preceeding the weight loss didn't it? And now I am presumably much healthier than I was in the beginning of the year. Do I remember when my RHR was in the high 70s? That couldn't be normal could it? Tonight I let myself have an early night, went to bed same time as Johnnie. It was an eezy-peezy Monday. I'll take more of the same the rest of the week please.
I allowed myself to tank yesterday knowing full well I would at least be playing golf today and therefore getting my exercise. And of course it's yet another opportunity to learn and align, that is to learn to align my desired outcomes with whatever is going on in my head. Rest assured I will cut to the chase and I did not align well today. I had a pretty terrible game actually. I probably had about 5 good shots the entire game. 1 good putt that went in the entire game. Wow. And this was while playing with an older couple and another older gentleman and Scott. It was like my ego got triggered because I was playing with people I really could show off my skills on. And instead the opposite happened. Case in point on Hole 3. The short hole. After a couple of practice swings with my 5 iron, I swung at the ball. And missed. I mean I missed by so much it looked like I was still doing a practice swing. I tried again, and did it again. I had completely speeded up my own swing which was why I was missing the bell. This after topping the ball off the tee on Hole 1, topping it again on the fairway, overhitting past the hole and then taking 3 putts to make it. This was on the very first hole that I felt I should hit on a par on every single time. Hole 2 I at least hit the ball well off the tee. But a 150 shot that I should have landed on the green instead was a wild whiff way right, which I REALLY NEED TO LEARN TO STOP DOING. That's when I know my head is not right and my focus is off. Lesson: SLOW DOWN. Focus on the target while being way off the ball then let the shot come to you when you approach the ball. In rhythm. I know what I should have done differently now. Back to Hole 3. How is it that the last time I played this hole, I hit a bump and run that almost went in from well in front of the green? From the side, I over hit it today. Again another sign that my focus was off, my feel was off. How off? On Hole 9 I hit the ball way left to the street! I do that when my focus is not right. So how exactly do I make it right? That's the work I need to do don't I? Because honestly I didn't have fun out there because I played so badly.
Oh well at least we got done by 11:10. I had enough time to go home and put everything away including my own negative thoughts and order from Crimson Mediterranean. And then since it was so early I didn't drive to Crimson to pick up my lunch, I scootered there using the side streets near Gateway and then the side streets all the way to Bundy and then Santa Monica. I loved that I did this. And I ate right there at the restaurant too. Funny, I looked in my journal later and I had the same exact lunch a year ago almost to the day right after golf. By then it was just Scott and I since Greg had already left for Arizona. Man, it's been an entire year that it had just been he and I playing together. Well, with exceptions and inclusions of other golfers here and there. But as far as sticking? It's just Scott and I. What am I going to do later on in the month when he goes to NY for 2 weeks? Play by myself that's what. Oh well, now full from lunch I scootered back home without incident and then took a nice little nap that lasted almost an hour. I reflected on the week that had just passed. Weirdness at the start with the whole Frontier thing and I was way out of sync. But I got it back together by the following day and then it was eezy peezy for the rest of the week. I expect much of the same for next week too. Although I really REALLY want to solve the puzzle of keeping my focus together so I can manifest the outcomes that I want. I was using golf to practice. And I resisted the idea of frustration. Merely that I need more information. And I need help intuiting that information. Clearly, the ego was more in charge today and so I am still learning. There are tidbits and flashes of brilliance <e.g. first 2 holes at Roosevelt when I had a par and almost another one> that did not last. The key is being consistent so I get there the same way every time. And then making it last. Didn't even get to that level right off the gate. And it never got better. I'll look at film (my own internals) tomorrow. In the meantime, now I have House of Dragon to look forward to on Sunday nights. And it did not disappoint. The dinner that I chose did though... turkey meatloaf from Sprouts that tasted too turkey-ish and gamey. Washed it down with peppermint hot tea. So it was that I had a pretty quiet weekend. And I'm looking forward to next week's short week!
Other than the weekend before school started that Lisa and Johnnie took off for Wisconsin for the weekend, it had been rare that I didn't see Johnnie on a Saturday for the past few months. I think even Lisa sensed last night that I was tapping out because I rarely drop him off at her office, at least not without her asking. And maybe I was tapping out without acknowledging it, particularly to myself. It's like we had our moment getting our dinners together and that was it, I was done. Not that it had been a particularly busy week at work. Not really. Not at all in fact. But my urinary system continuing to communicate to me about imbalances emotional, physical, or otherwise is something I still need to work on in terms or root cause I think. Or maybe it's just gas? LOL. Anyway, I didn't hear from Lisa about making an appearance for breakfast and this morning it was me actually inventing a reason to go over to her house. Johnnie had left his water bottles and I drove over to return them. Lo and behold I run into them walking back (or in Johnnie's case biking back) from dropping Claire off at the groomers. And so I did the water bottle exchange right there on the street. "I'll see you Monday Dad" I heard Johnnie say. That was my 1 minute with Johnnie today. By then it was mid-morning already so I figured I'd at least do my grocery shopping. Usually I would have Johnnie with me on a Saturday. And I told myself it was ok to let Lisa be mommy for the weekend. Last week she blew off Family Night at Mar Vista after all and then had to work again the next day. This is her time to make it up. I wonder if Johnnie actually thinks about that when Lisa misses those things. I mean he is completely aware of the schedule and it is cemented in his own awareness. And when Lisa even jokes (or maybe not jokes) that she is taking Johnnie back a day early on Wednesday, Johnnie quite seriously tells her it isn't her turn. THAT'S MY BOY. As far as long term ramifications and consequences? We will have to see. So far so good though I think. Except that feeling of a void or a hole in my being when I'm driving back. Yes I do definitely miss him on Saturday, and this Saturday in particular. For no really good reason even other than it's Saturday. And I'm simply going to have to be ok with that.
And so what did I do this Saturday? It wasn't like I didn't have anything to do at all really. It IS timecard day on Monday and HRSA survey day too. I usually do those things BEFORE Monday. And then of course I still hadn't completely finished cleaning my apartment. I didn't get to the bedroom. Or the bathroom. God knows I need to clean the toilet as well. And of course there are always these classes I need to do. So many of them. William Whitecloud. Manifesting with Rapid Recode, videos from David Snyder, Developing my own intuition (particularly to communicate with my physical self for supposed medical conditions) with Ellen Meredith, finishing stuff with Sapien Medicine stuff, finishing Bengston image cycling stuff. It's like I do just enough to dabble but not to be really expert at stuff. And that by itself is something I need to work on. And that's not even to mention all the money stuff and trading stuff I want to learn. So many things. Sometimes I feel like anchoring on the fact that I do have Johnnie to give myself the excuse that I'm too busy to do these things. But then again I'm not busy to watch the Dodgers game am I? I'm not too busy to watch Game of Thrones reruns am I? So I am reduced to watching videos on YouTube on the same subjects I mentioned above. And OBTW every time I feel a tickle in my bladder, or kidney, or urethra now I'm turning on a healing audio to clear a meridian. Kidney. Bladder. Something. Now I KNOW I really need to simply focus on health and the healthy blueprint. And being in balance. And that I can only do by slowing down my mind and slowing down myself. And that I tried to do this afternoon, though not all that successfully. But I did manage to get some time in. And before I knew it the day had gone. I just called it a lazy day. It was so lazy I was still at 7000 steps by 10 PM and I had to scramble just to get to 9500. No excuse not to really so I did it. At least I got to 70+ active minutes. And yes I did end up binging GoT again until well past midnight. smh why do I do this to myself??
So I was dealing with the kidney stone stuff last night but unlike before I managed to clear this particular episode up pretty quickly last night. I remembered healing everything with just frequencies the last time I had a flareup in my bladder. And this time I used pretty much the same frequencies to clear my meridians, the kidney and bladder specifically. The pain cleared up inside of 15 minutes. If I were putting a number to the degree of pain, I'd give it a 5 but it still would have potentially kept me up all night. Not this time. It was no more than a nuisance really and I was asleep before midnight and I woke up with no sign of pain, no sign of discomfort and as if it had never happened. I posted the video that I think did it pretty much in case this happens again in the future. I will say since I shifted my perception to include emotional diagnosis and vibrational modalities, it has been easier to deal with physical stuff that I'm sure the majority of people would see a doctor for. I can only think of all the stuff it would have saved Dexter had he had the same beliefs. I did send him some audios but I am pretty sure he didn't really listen to them. Not really. And even if he did, I was pretty sure he didn't believe. I guess that is something I need to work on too. How do I get more people to believe? No shortage of those suffering from ailments in my circle. Practically everyone, Lisa included. She has enough issues believing some of the stuff her mom asks her to try. I guess it's all about the fundamental belief that in physics over chemistry. That one's body is a vibrational entity rather than a physical one. And why not? Are we not made up of atoms, which is stuff that vibrates all the time? Not to mention all the emotional disturbances that cause dis-ease in the first place. I still have to ask for Guidance on the root cause of this or it will come up again, or manifest as something else. But in the meantime, I'm perfectly fine just going about my usual Friday, which will be the last Friday in August actually as we head towards the Labor Day weekend next week.
In the meantime, I had myself a TANK DAY today. Hadn't had one of these in a while. I think I may rename it to ME TIME FRIDAY. I may have recovered quickly from last night but I felt like taking it easy anyway, especially since I looked at my calendar and it was pretty clear for the entire day for a change. Usually I'd be picking up Claire at Lisa's house, maybe take a shower over there and have a late breakfast like last week. Today, Lisa decided to bring the dog over herself. Don't know why really but I didn't care. I guess I shower in my own bathroom today, which was a must anyway since I hadn't showered since Monday. I still had the same sausage and egg McMuffin breakfast 2-for-1 breakfast from McDonald's. And I'm glad that despite me eating more meat and carbs, my weight isn't really going up and my BP isn't either. The key is to keep looking I guess and make sure I keep it balanced. I had a pretty healthy tuna sandwich and tomato soup at lunch so I kept it healthy and I chilled all day and did nothing but laundry until it was time to pick up Johnnie. Last week there was the Friday night thing at school. Tonight, nothing. And so we did a Friday night summer special. Which was to pick up Panda Express at Westwood and then go to Poquito Mas to pick up my dinner. Used to be I'd get ahi tuna tostada. But tonight I figured I'd go against the grain some more and have a steak burrito which I had not had in so long. We weren't even home yet from picking up dinner when Lisa already called. But instead of asking her to immediately pick up Johnnie I asked her to wait a half hour since we hadn't eaten yet. I'm thinking now that she might have called early to see where we were with dinner in the hopes of being invited maybe? That didn't even cross my mind. We already had dinner in hand besides. And so she stayed to do her notes instead of picking up Johnnie and he and I did our usual Friday night dinner. What did I used to do pre-pandemic on Fridays? Did I just stick around at work and have dinner downtown? Mostly I did just that didn't I? Nothing to do at home since Lisa used to have Friday off and picked up Johnnie herself. Tonight at least I got to spend a couple of more hours with him and I milked that up until 8 PM when I decided I'd go ahead and deliver him to Lisa. She wasn't home yet but I drove JOhnnie and Claire to her office. He was already bored at my apartment anyway. This kid knows the schedule to be sure. And that was perfectly fine. It was going to be an early night for me anyway. I figured my body was telling me to get more rest right? Check. Sleep at 10:30 PM tonight.
Usually I have all these meetings on Thursday mornings and then I get through those and it's smooth sailing the rest of the day. Today I dropped Johnnie off at school and I will say I'm getting used to that new routine nicely. I didn't have to be anywhere today for the first time all week. And then after my first meeting with the IS Team, the rest of the morning sort of disintegrated. There's no one left on the EHR Team, my 2 best are out on COVID protocol and one is still on medical leave. So no meeting. And then Dennis is out on vacation so no meeting with him either. Turned out my morning was freer than I thought. And so in a moment of inspiration, and looking around my apartment to see how dirty it was, I started cleaning it. The living room at least. The floors, and then the blinds. Those had gotten such an accumulation of dirt, I needed to really spend time to clean those out. But at least after an hour or so, the living room was pretty clean. And I actually felt good that I got to do that today. Already this is a different Thursday. I made myself lunch... fish today. The barramundi from the weekend and the tilapia I brought Lisa that she gave to me back. Funny, every piece of food that needs to be prepared that I give her, I mostly get back. Interesting wasn't it? I must have had too much fish though because my stomach didn't feel right after. I felt bloated. And then as the afternoon went on, I started to feel pressure in my pelvis area. Which radiated down to my legs. Uh-oh. More urinary stuff? What's going on now? I went to Mitsuwa in the middle of the afternoon to get udon for Johnnie's dinner later. And then I realized that the pressure in my back wasn't from the fish. Is this another kidney stone attack? Because it sure feels like it. A low grade one anyway.
That ache is dull now, but I am now afraid it might get worse. Might? I'm trying to figure out what brought this on now, in the hopes of stopping it where it stands before it gets worse. In the meantime, I have to pick up Johnnie from school, get him through Spanish class, make him dinner and wait for Lisa to pick him up. Simple right? But now I am way distracted by this ache in my back. The last time this happened was 3 months ago and that time, I thought it was because of some of the morphic fields I was listening to made me focus on a condition I was trying to avoid, which brought it on as a result. I focused on what I didn't want, and got it. Is this what happened today? All I did was clean the apartment this morning. I mean there were the usual distractions from work, even a meeting with the Mobile Dental team that really lasted all of 15 minutes. More annoyances than anything. Maybe the accumulation of stuff from earlier in the week that I needed to express and release? Or perhaps an extension of something Lisa is experiencing? Damn I need to cut that cord off don't I? Anyway the regular stuff as I outlined went about pretty quietly. The Spanish class, dinner, and now that I'm sure I am experiencing another kidney stone attack, I went on to my dinner: shrimp and vegetables over some of those shirataki noodles. It was during that time that I realized the difference today, I didn't have Claire with me all day. I left her with Lisa last night and although she worked, at least she didn't go in until well after lunch. When she called it was already 8:15 and she was already at home. Sigh. No choice but to drop Johnnie off over there. And to figure out what to do with the dull ache in my back or I end up having a bad night's sleep like I did a few weeks ago when I had a pain in my bladder area. Pretty clear that I am getting targeted down there as a weak spot. Gotta work on that, at least to be able to ward off future attacks. But tonight I have to deal with the present one...
Wednesdays I now spend at the FRB although really there is no specific reason I need to be there other than I said I would from now on. And so I did the Johnnie drop-off and then immediately went home got dressed and off I went downtown. I got there by 9 AM even, which makes me wonder why I took my sweet time getting there by 9:30 before the pandemic. I even lingered a bit at the school watching Johnnie and his friends play before class started at 8:15. It's good to know Johnnie now has a core set of friends and I noticed a whole lot of kids saying hi to him. Sure is a long way from the little kid in TK that was one of the smallest kids in the class and didn't want to play with anyone the first week. Not so anymore. Anyway I got to the FRB and everyone else filtered in later than I did. As I said, I didn't really have a specific need to be there, except... it does have the machine that I like to use in the gym, which is the one that trains you for pull-ups. And so if anything else, at least I did over 100 reps on the machines and felt like I got a pretty good chest and arms workout. And I managed to get SOME work done too. And for lunch I went upstairs to the cafeteria for the 2nd week in a row. While there I was joined by Sr Ruth and Barbara and at the risk of waxing nostalgic yet again, I do miss the history of having lunch with them almost every day for years. At lunch we go beyond titles and formalities pretty much and we could just talk as people. I guess in that sense I do agree with Eloisa in that all that is what is missing when the pandemic hit and we're no longer seeing each other face to face. I still would rather work remotely though than go back to the office, at least not for more than a day. By the time I headed home it was just 1:30 PM and I still have most of the afternoon still before I have to pick up Johnnie. What did I do with this ME time? I walked Claire and then I remembered tonight we're going to have dinner at Lisa's house. At first, I resisted that idea only because of all the recent negative history of simply being at Lisa's house when she's there. I mean the odds of being yelled at at some point is fairly high. And I have no intention of butting heads with her when Johnnie is around. But then again all that is up to me isn't it? I let everything go and just stopped resisting and simply planned on making spaghetti. I mean if we're going back in time, wasn't in Sunday nights at Lisa's first apartment at Lindbrook that I used to make us spaghetti dinner... until Lisa got tired of it LOL. I guess I can do this just this once... hopefully just this once.
And so ME TIMe turned into not-so-much-for-ME time and I headed out and got some ground turkey and then made turkey bolognese since Lisa had requested that I bring some meat. Of course I'm going to have to cook anyway, what are the chances she will be zonked after a hard day's work? Still, Johnnie seems excited about it so I have to be as well, or at least pretend to be. I picked him up and we were at Lisa's office by the usual 5 PM to do Johnnie's Spanish class. By then I had also gotten a lot of steps in for the day which I made sure I did so I wouldn't be too behind when we got done at Lisa's. Who knows when that would be anyway?! Lisa at least didn't stay too long and we were actually at her house by 6:30 PM. All I had to do was boil spaghetti, and since the bolognese was already cooked, all I had to do there was put the marinara sauce in. Lisa wanted to do rosemary buttered sour dough toast AND wanted to do a salad. And it was actually Johnnie that did all that stuff since Lisa was predictably zonked and wanted to lie down. She is, if anything, pretty predictable. And I actually didn't mind. When it is expected, there is no let down, no resentment. And in the end we actually had a nice table all prepared. Lisa commented that this was so much better than eating at Maria's. I begged to differ since she didn't actually do any of the cooking, but I wasn't going to say anything either. I just wanted to have a nice meal. Johnnie got his spaghetti, I got my bolognese, and Lisa got her salad. Again, predictably, Lisa was too tired to do anything and wanted to lay down after dinner. Of course I had to do the dishes LOL LOL. All that took 15 minutes and at least, if Lisa was that tired, then we wouldn't have to stick around to do anything. I wanted to go home and watch the Dodger game. Or listen to some of my audios. Anything else but stick around at Lisa's. In the end, I left Claire with her. Hey at least if she needed company, this would do right? And Johnnie and I got to spend Wednesday night finishing BAD GUYS from last night and I did get to watch the Dodgers game after all. Spaghetti night was a pretty good success tonight and THAT would be the PLAY OF THE DAY. I am all good with that!
So I figured that Johnnie and I are coming down or have come down with a minor cold. It's funny, scratchy throat + cough and I'm scrambling to get tested for COVID. Used to be a cold was just a cold and I would just ignore it. But to be fair, I have not had a cold in more than 2 years either. And it wasn't even like it was a bad cold or anything. Just a scratchy throat and for Johnnie, lots of coughing. Note: I tested negative for COVID ok? And anyway, it didn't seem to bother Johnnie much. I dropped him off at school and there he was off and playing with James and Brooklyn. I'm really glad he's sort of growing up from toddler Johnnie into little kid Johnnie and that is just fine with me. Soon as I dropped him off I went home and got dressed and took off for Westlake North, where I'm playing manager for the 2nd day in a row. I'm not really sure what I'm expected to do other than I.T. stuff. Today I was asked about employee benefits, the security guard asked if he could go to lunch the same time the PSRs do. I mean why not? The clinic is supposed to be closed but I didn't care. I'd stand watch in the waiting room while everyone was out at lunch. That's what a manager does right? Today I had the most frustrating morning because my DELL XPS13 experienced all kinds of network issues. To the point where I was starting to take out my frustrations with my team. Is it the network? I don't know. Is it my laptop? Maybe. But I acknowledge I was frustrated as hell and mainly because I didn't bring my Mac. So I couldn't do personal stuff because those websites were blocked. Or at least they were blocked on MY work DELL. Grrr. By noon I decided I'd take a walk. I needed to keep up my steps count anyway and build on the great start from yesterday. I found a Chipotle about a half a mile from the clinic, right past PIH hospital. It's strange that the neighborhood the clinic is in is decidedly low-income. But a few blocks away is where the downtown area starts and where Chipotle was located and THAT area was not low-income for sure. How would you explain rich-looking white kids eating at Chipotle that either go to USC or go to a magnet high school nearby. Or living at the building a block away that reminded you of the Orsini where Lisa used to live in dental school and where I would spend time when we were first starting to date. Another nod to a happier past (at least as far as she and I were concerned. Why all this re-living all of a sudden?) That is my question to myself. I noticed that there were no vagrants or homeless people around there either. Just people taking a break for lunch. It is definitely the middle-to-high class. And I was there and enjoyed my steak bowl over fajita vegetables. And when I walked back to the clinic, it felt like walking across the DMZ. And back to where poverty was more obvious. Sad actually. No different than where I live isn't it? Toney Mar Vista but a block away under the freeway, all sorts of homeless people. Of course even the way I write about it smacks of judgement doesn't it? The question is how do I exercise compassion and empathy while still keeping true to my own path?
I mulled all this through the afternoon as I continued to have laptop issues, limiting my activity to fixing the damn thing in the first place and wishing I was home. I didn't stay until the end of the day and I was home by 4:05. I immediately took Claire out for a walk and I could already feel the breeze and the cooler temps in the westside. I picked up Johnnie at 5 PM and he was sweating as if he had just played a game of basketball. Which is what he did he would tell me. I guess Coach Tony was there and let them all play. We immediately went to Panda Express from there and picked up his dinner. And some noodles for mine. While Johnnie ate, I gave myself a haircut. It appears that I may not be needing to pay $30 for a haircut ever again. Not if I could get myself neat with just the shears I already have. It took all of 15 minutes too. I was done before Johnnie even finished eating. Which gave me time to make my own meal. Shrimp and baby boy chow added to the noodles made a fine dinner for me. And then afterwards, Johnnie had to do his evening rest and relaxation in the hot tub (see pic). Who knew this would be a Johnnie staple for his summer evenings while here at my place? He played his sink-or-float with the toys he had while he was still a baby. And while he was there, I still got to walk the dog and let her out for her evening walk, I still managed to finish my steps which added up to more than 12,000 today and got to 70 active minutes. I'm already ahead of last week's pace in fact. And I got to relax myself, watching the sun go down and twilight take over just sitting at the jacuzzi not even in the water. It was like back in the Lindbrook days when I would run at twilight. My favorite time. There I go reminiscing again LOL. And so with that Johnnie got to wind down watching BAD GUYS which I was able to download. I wasn't as tired as yesterday. But I still wanted to have an early night knowing full well I usually sleep longest and get the most rest on the nights Johnnie is with me. I needed to take advantage. And so we were both out by 10:30.
So yesterday I had mentioned off-energy I sensed first thing. Today that seemed to manifest physically again, this time in the form of a scratchy throat. Although, I am not so sure it wasn't because I had a fan blowing in my face all night long while listening to some healing chamber acoustics. Either way I needed to get going early this morning because I'm scheduled to be at Westlake North to babysit yet again, for at least the morning. I had scheduled an install for Frontier fiber this afternoon mainly because it seemed much cheaper than Spectrum. We shall see. Promised to be a un-routinely busy Monday though. For some reason Marina scheduled me to babysit Westlake North today AND tomorrow. I'm not so sure I'm as unbothered as I let on about that. At best, it's a pain in the ass to be driving down to K-town in the morning. And so I started the day with a walk around the neighborhood if just to get my bearings and to get centered. Besides, no reason why I shouldn't shoot for the usual 15000 steps Monday especially since I pulled it off last week already and it was the busiest work Monday I had had in quite a while. And I was running well behind into the afternoon in terms of the number of steps. And still I made 15,000. No excuse for today then. And so it was that I headed off to the Health Center after my walk and after a shower and it took only an hour for the day to be turned on its head. That's when a Frontier installer called me to let me know he's in front of my building. W-h-a-t? I thought the install was this afternoon!! I did not want to miss this chance so I told him to wait and I hurried back home. Fortunately traffic wasn't as bad as I thought and I actually got there in 24 minutes. And then I would find out that he needed to get in to the MPOE room. But of course the leasing office is closed and there is no one around with a key. Sigh. And so I now have to reschedule the install. Double sigh. I rushed all the way home for nothing it turned out. Oh well, at least I could have some home-made lunch at my apartment. I made my tuna salad and had a healthy sandwich. Only to find out i was still hungry. So I stopped at BK down the block from the clinic on the way back... because of course I had to come all the way back. I left my computer there. I got a fish sandwich and went on with the day. At least I got a scheduled meeting in, tried to answer some staff questions and I went home by 4 PM. By then it had gotten considerably warmer. Also by then I had gotten to 8000 steps.
Time Travelling. How did I do that you asK? By doing static steps in the Manager's office. That is to move my arms vigorously while barely moving my feet up and down. This action actually does speed up my heart rate to the point where I'm 120 bpm+. Good enough to get me to 70 active minutes by that time as well. One thing I did notice when driving home today was driving through Hoover and the USC area which reminded me of the route I used to take to go from USC to Lisa's old apartment at the Orsini back in the day. As in circa 2006. The early days is what I call those and I still fondly recall July - Aug 2006 as one of the happiest time periods of my life. I remember around this time in 2006 when Lisa got her first dental job and I got rehired by USC at USC Stevens and we celebrated having to return to work. Same energy as Johnnie returning to school last week. Funny thing. I prefer those pleasant memories CLEARLY to July 2018 when I left Maplewood or the energy of leaving Lindbrook August 2016. I still need to do some clearing on those every now and again. But at least there ARE those pleasant memories to override the not-so-pleasant ones. Maybe THAT is one reason I'm being made to spend time here at Westlake North. Despite the clusterfuck that was this morning, I at least got that internet install rescheduled to next week and at the end of the day, I was able to clear away the negative residue of whatever was bugging me at the beginning of the day. Of course there was the Johnnie pick-up and today mom and son was not in the middle of some scheduled something or other. Sometimes I will admit I'm still torn between picking up Johnnie as fast as I could OR indulging Lisa's attempts to be social and spend time. Today it was checking out her new ADT system. Which wasn't really totally working yet. But I knew she saw my impatience at having to stick around. Hey at least I didn't say anything didn't I? I tried to be respectful. But I had lots to do. Still gotta bake cookies for Johnnie. Boil eggs for the week. And of course I knew Johnnie wanted to go to my apartment already. It's our time together now. And he underscored that by giving me a massage actually (see pic). Of course I had to give him one too. And that made me realize that I was tired tonight. More tired than usual, and not from the steps either. I needed some sleep I think. Nice, healing sleep. I went to bed same time as Johnnie did. He needed the rest too I think. I don't even know what they did the last couple of days. But I KNOW he needed it. We're all good.
I woke up today sluggish and a bit sore in my lower back. Is it simply all the healing stuff I've been listening to while I sleep <which I've done all week> because I can't think of what would have made me sore from the last couple of days. Maybe I'm just lagging behind in recovery time from the entire week? Plus I'm feeling a surge of what I call yuk energy, like something negative is lingering around that I definitely need to shake. That part I know I simply need to go within and do some release exercises. Probably just some stuck energy that has surfaced BECAUSE of all the audios I've been listening to. While doing the release stuff, I'm thinking about Scott at this time since he did divulge last week that he had been having issues with his hip and was leaning towards hip replacement. I'm trying to remember what he was like a dozen years ago. Closer to 15 years actually since I went to my old journals and read where he was already playing with us way back in 2008! I didn't describe my golf game then as eloquently as I do these days LOL, but I do remember hitting long shots already and aspiring to do those as consistently as Scott did then. These days he complains of being a short hitter now. And to be fair, it's a really good day when he can hit the. ball 200 yards. Today that was the part of my game I really liked. Like I was really hitting bombs off the tee, which meant I was able to shake off all that yuck energy from the morning. Of course I had a blowup hole right off the bat on Hole 1, on a Hole I usually expect to hit a par on. And the 2nd hole was better, but still took me 6. And the 3rd Hole went way right and my 2nd shot went short. Not the way I wanted to start this game. I settled myself down and just focused on the hole in front of me. And lo and behold on Hole 4, I hit a great shot off the tee, hit a nice fairway shot that almost made it all the way to the green, hit a bump and run that went well past the hole, but then I sank a long-ish 10-ft putt to make a PAR! Awesome. That energy would carry over to the next hole, where I hit a nice tee shot, and the funnel hole after that, and even on Hole 8. Actually I didn't hit many shots that I'd say were fairway whiffs. Maybe a couple. Far less than usual. What did not work for me was the bump and run stuff from the fringe where I would end up missing the hole and running the ball past it by a lot. Made me work extra hard. Still, I ended up with 3 other bogeys besides the par. I did't get 2 pars that I wanted, but hey I did not play badly at all. Scott did not get any pars but hey, we were simply thankful we got done by 11:30, it was actually overcast mostly so it wasn't all that hot, and we got to play yet again, which is something I will no longer take for granted.
Today is a Lisa work Saturday but like the last work Saturday Lisa is seeing a friend as her last appointment meaning there are plans right after. But today since that friend is Yadira, of course Dexter wants to come and be part of whatever they plan. And so that means I have to be included too right? I even offered to pick up Dexter and drive him back home which would make it a 4-way trip for me. But I didn't mind. At least not today. Anyway Lisa just asked us to meet them at her office at 12:30 and we would do something from there. As for Johnnie and I, it really was simply the usual Saturday routine. Except that when I got to Lisa's house, he was still asleep. Mom and son must have stayed up until late last night. Which was fine. It's the weekend after all. Lisa took off and left me with a grocery list since her fridge was completely empty. To be fair, it was I that suggested me getting her stuff to tide them over until at least Monday. And to be clear, I was thinking about Johnnie really. I didn't him to be stuck without any food. And so I was happy to bring at least eggs and milk and pasta over. I was going to go to the grocery store already anyway. First we started with a shower Johnnie and I, which would make it the 2nd consecutive day I'm showering there at Lisa's. And then when we got all done, we went to have dad-son breakfast at Elysee. No matter what happens today, we get that under our belt and we're already good to go. We then went on the grocery shopping spree. First stop was Target to pick up stuff for Johnnie's lunch for next week. Then a stop at Sprouts to pick up vegetables for Lisa. After all, if you're going to get veggies, then Sprouts is the place to go. And then we dropped my groceries off at the apartment and then went back to Lisa's to wait for Dexter. I asked him to go there first since we were going to be there anyway. And he came before noon actually. I told him about the 12:3o meet-up and he immediately asked if we could stop somewhere first to get a snack or something. How he knows Lisa well. That 12:30 is probably going to turn into 1:30 PM simply because we're going to have to wait for her. And so I took him to Campos Tacos right down the street where I got my nachos on Friday. Today Dexter got himself a couple of chicken tacos. And got me a carne asada taco for good measure. And so we were both satisfied that even if Lisa holds us all time hostage, we'll be ok for a while.
How TRUE all that turned out to be! Yadira got done with her appointment at 12:30 but as usual we had to wait for Lisa to close out her day. And although we did manage to do some catching up <after all, we hadn't seen Yadira in more than a year> we were all HUNGRY, including Johnnie who usually eats right at noon when he is with me. By the time we left Lisa's office it was already close to 2 PM. At least I had already picked where to go . It was either Sunnin Lebanese or Hop Li. Between the dietary requirements of Dexter, which was different than Lisa's, and then of course it has to be somewhere where Johnnie could have rice and chicken, which was why I narrowed the choices down to those two. Lisa picked Sunnin from there, which turned out to be an excellent choice. We hadn't eaten at Sunnin since before the pandemic more than 2 years ago! I remember the last time we ate here with Sam Plotkin and family it was after one of Lisa's soccer Sunday games. And Johnnie would fall asleep. That was closer to more than 3 years ago then. Anyway this was as close to a reunion as the four of us <me, Dexter, Yadira, and Lisa> had gotten in some time. And our dynamic as a foursome is certainly very unique. Yadira has no qualms about calling Lisa out in such a way that makes Lisa almost deferential. I certainly wouldn't be able to get away from talking to Lisa the way she does, not without an immediate fight at least. And even today Lisa did her dispute routine... which is to say she finds a way to dispute something that I say as if she was fact-checking me, or at least trying to catch me in some sort of inaccuracy. Usually I don't say anything. But in the presence of this foursome, I did. And said it strongly. As I said different context when the four of us are together. Usually we would talk about some current event that Lisa has no idea is going on and we would have to explain SAID current event and its implications. Today we even went back in time and brought up stuff from a trip we all took to Sedona and the Grand Canyon many years ago on a Thanksgiving weekend, even before that week was earmarked for a trip to Maui for many a Thanksgiving. To say we all have history together is an understatement. But it was good to share a meal together at least. And to underscore how this context was different, it was LISA that even paid for it, and I'm sure we'll all be billed after. But her tone was sure different from the last meal we had to split with Dexter's sister and brother-in-law. Heck we got into a fight over that one, which again underscores the difference in context. Anyway Yadira took off after the meal. I was so full. I had ouzo with lamb and if I didn't have anything for dinner, that would have been just fine I actually ended up having just a salad. It was all I would want and I chilled to watching reruns of stuff and also doing some healing audios. It turned out to be a way different Saturday, mainly because of the company. But it was still a pretty good Saturday at that. And most of all, I loved that I got to spend some time with Johnnie. THAT covers everything else.
So this week was uneven in that it started out like gangbusters in every way. Busy at work, Johnnie's first week of school. By today, all was done, all seemed good and then already a Family Night at Mar Vista Elementary. Kind of a reprise of the Family Night in June. Didn't seem like it was so long ago still. Anyway today, it's Lisa turn to get a feel for the new routine and it would appear they got to the school early. She had called me before 8 AM to remind me to pick up Claire in her backyard. That would be the earliest in a while that Lisa would be dropping Johnnie off at school and that is a very good thing. In the meantime, I was way too distracted to do a meditation session this morning. I know I should have pushed through. Instead I went to Lisa's to pick up Claire and while there, I took a shower in the downstairs bathroom. I felt yucky in that I hadn't showered since Monday. This took care of that. And then I picked up a couple of sausage and egg McMuffins for breakfast and that officially kick-started my Friday. Of course by that time it was already well past 9 AM. It would have been great to have a chill Friday like the picture of Claire in my living room there, just chilling right there on the floor. But I still had to attend to the Salesforce Meeting close to lunchtime. But the right after that I made me a nice salmon and daal+rice lunch. Pretty healthy, which would make up for the stuff, healthy or otherwise, that I was sure to eat tonight at the Family Night. In the meantime, there were other things that were in my attention. Today is payday Friday and once again I realized that right here right now, I had over $100K cash in savings and I do need to do whatever I can to multiply that. I mean it's nice to know I have a stash to support me in case something happens to my job but I really can multiply this even more and that IS part of the plan that I hadn't done anything with just yet. And then I got a letter from Spectrum saying I'm getting a price hike. Just like that I signed up for Frontier Internet and scheduled an install for Monday. Now to do something about Spectrum TV so I can continue to watch Dodgers and Lakers games. And then I did a load of laundry too not knowing what tomorrow is going to be like since Yadira is coming up and Dexter, even in his condition, seems eager to spend time to hang out all 4 of us. Ok then.
By 4 PM I started to prep for the Mar Vista picnic. Went to Panda Express and picked up our food. And then for whatever reason I had a hankering for nachos. And I don't mean any old nachos from Taco Bell or Del Taco either. I was thinking more like Campos Tacos. And so I tried to arrange it so I'd get all our food, including water, including our picnic chairs and all packed up and ready to pick up Johnnie by 5 PM. I did that even better. Even while having to stop at Campos Tacos I got to the school bEFORE 5 PM, and just around the same time Brooklyn's parents were getting there. And we parked the same place we did last June at the end-of-school Family Night. I remember it got pretty cold then for whatever reason. Yes, cold in the middle of June. Not tonight. It was already scorching hot while I was out and about picking up food. When I got there I got a call from Lisa. Somehow I already knew what it was going to be about. Of course she was tired and feeling off because of a full day at her office. That part was normal. But tonight, she simply said she didn't feel like joining the picnic. She was feeling sick, she was feeling tired, she was on medication, she was this, she was that. I tried to be empathetic and feel what it would have been like if this was a month ago when I was experiencing all the bleeding stuff. Would I have gone to this? I believe so yes, I would have figured out a way to make it. Heck I still played golf didn't I? Anyway, I already had the dinner part beat from last time when we spent over an hour in line just ordering food. This time I started on the nachos almost right as I got there. And it was really good, gooey with cheese, and the beef was excellent. And I still had a couple of Panda Express dinners in the bag since now Lisa isn't going to show. I told myself I was going to do my best not to judge her. I honestly didn't care that she didn't make it. The less I have to think about. In the meantime Johnnie was having fun in the playground playing with a whole bunch of kids, particularly James who he is starting to be good friends with. Of course, I had no idea where Johnnie was when Brooklyn came in crying for whatever reason and when Blair asked her if she wanted to go back to the play structure, it was James who had come over and went there with her taking her by the hand. Hmmm. I ask again where Johnnie was. He didn't seem that concerned or maybe not so attentive with Brooklyn. At least not like James was in that moment. Something to wonder about I guess. Is Johnnie no longer interested? Hey they are KIDS I remind myself. Anyway, we left earlier than usual tonight and we went back to my apartment where Johnnie could hang out and watch his videos while we let Lisa get some rest. Not at all unusual for a Lisa Friday actually. And later on by 8:15 she called us and that's when I took Johnnie and Claire back. Lisa seemed to be in good spirits even, which seemed to me made it a good call to let her have some rest. She even ate some of the Panda Express I had bought for her for her dinner. Of course when I went on home I had to do some exercises about releasing whatever negative energy I had internalized simply by Lisa's mere act of not showing up at the Family Night. I say I don't care but I definitely could sense there were some energies there that would have been pent-up. Some resentment energy and anger and I was glad to release it quickly without giving it a chance to fester. I also noticed I felt some residual tiredness. And I am not so sure it's a physical tired either. It's ok. I was glad to hang out at the school Family Night, glad Johnnie had a good time, glad it was payday, glad there was no negative energy between Lisa and I. Just a Good Friday before the weekend. All good.
I just love that we now get to be in the school courtyard when Johnnie gets dropped off. Gives us parents a chance to see the kids interacting like it was almost normal. And Johnnie hanging with Brooklyn and Bailey first thing? That is DEFINITELY back to normal. It's also nice for the parents to meet each other and this morning I even waited until Johnnie's teacher came out and took them in to the classroom. Which gave me a chance to meet her for the first time. That didn't happen in kindergarten OR the first grade... at least not in person. All I can say was that this was already shaping up to be a different kind of year and that's good. After drop-off, I went home, enjoyed bacon and eggs for breakfast, and a cup of hot tea and slogged through my Thursday morning slew of meetings. At least I knew by lunchtime, all would be done and effectively the work week would be over pretty much. Oh, I forgot there's also the HIT Roundtable I gotta do. That too would be part of breathe-out week usually. Today, I had an extra long meeting with the IS Team. But a very short meeting with the EHR team because Lainine tested positive for COVID and wasn't around. Damn. I'm down to 1! I need them to just hang on until next week. And then Dennis cancelled his one-on-one with me. I made myself that barramundi over channa masala and rice. Turned out pretty good if I do say so myself. And then I did the HIT Roundtable. Kind of an odd mix of emotions with that meeting. My co-chair Mendy almost skipped the meeting which irked me. My thought was 'I wonder what the heck that guy thinks being co-chair is about?' You're supposed to LEAD. Missing a meeting is not leading. And then when he got on late, I almost felt myself targeting him with some of my comments. Perhaps I had some anger there didn't I? Odd mix of emotions. And then Aisha sends me an email in the middle of the meeting telling me she didn't appreciate being the subject of 'Tiger Mom' jokes. Meaning we always made fun of her for being a little too protective. She reminded me this was her journey and she was right about that. I apologized and left it as a learning lesson for me to have a bit more empathy. Anyway that got done by 3 PM and THEN I pronounced the work day over LOL.
Nothing left but picking up Johnnie from STAR and the hand-off later on, which had the potential to be negatively charged because Lisa is seeing her dad at her clinic today. Why that had to involve me is simply my own choosing I reminded myself. As in the incident with Aisha, that is her projecting her own stuff. All you gotta do is apologize and not let it go any further in your awareness. And the apology is really to YOURSELF actually. I did some shield energy audios in the afternoon, watched the latest Disney series SHE HULK, and then caught up on steps. I noticed I was sore in the upper body which meant the workout yesterday did it's job. In the meantime, when I picked up Johnnie he reminded me that he did have his agenda today, which was to get a Pokemon toy from a McDonald's Happy Meal. How long has it been since we've gotten a Happy Meal from McDonald's? At least he ate the chicken nuggets. AND I gave him a heaping bowl of spaghetti too, which he downed quickly. And then his Spanish class got cancelled. Seemed to be the energy of today wasn't it? We actually had homework Johnnie and I. He had his real homework from school, and I had to fill out all of his first week of school paperwork due tomorrow. By the time Lisa called to pick him up it was 8:30 PM. I didn't say anything about it but I could sense Lisa was sniping at every word I said looking for a chance to get offended about something and get upset. Which is what happens every time she has an interaction with her family. She's still under that control which makes me sad for her. It's not something I can bring up with her either because it will simply piss her off even more. Best to just do the drop-off with the least interaction possible. Which was what happened tonight so all was good. I reminded myself not to bug about tomorrow either. She will tell ME if she wants me involved one way or another. Johnnie is now on her watch. And so I went on home and looked at my sleep patterns for the week. I had terrible sleep on Monday but the last 3 days I had really good sleep. That's what happens when I get to bed early. Which is totally dependent on Johnnie being in the house. Tonight I didn't get to bed until midnight but that's still ok. It's the end of the week after all. We're all good.
I have settled into this Wednesday routine where I drop Johnnie off (last week it was Penmar Day Camp) this week, it's just school and then I head off to the FRB fot at least the morning. The thing is there really isn't anything I could do at the FRB that I couldn't do at home so my visit is mostly symbolic. But then again, there is that nice gym downstairs and I DO need to keep up some resistance work don't I? And so I dropped Johnnie off, going the back way this time just to see if it's any closer <it wasn't>. I did stay with him long enough to see him in line doing his ninja thing with his friend James in line. Ahh that kid of mine... Off I went to the FRB where I talked to the Helpdesk, had my meeting with the Data Team <or at least just Shilpa because James called in sick again on my meeting day>, a meeting that lasted all of 10 minutes, and then basically spent the rest of the morning catching up with my journal. I remember I would do the same stuff when I was working all day here in my old office back in the day. Even more so this time, no one cares what anyone is doing here, although being here at least gets a couple of the C's to pop in and talk to me face to face if just to say hi. And at lunch, I even decided to stick around and eat at the cafeteria upstairs. At least after I did 3 sets of exercises on the machines at the gym. I did over 100 reps in all. I may not have worked out hard, but at least I DID work out. And my biceps felt the pump LOL. And so I went to the cafeteria and ended up having lunch with Barbara my old CEO of all people. The lunch faire sure looks different than from before the pandemic. I would dare say it is better even. But then again, I would prefer to have the old crew back with Mark, and Jose, etc. exchanging banter and stories. Still I did enjoy the salmon over angel hair pasta with alfredo sauce. And having lunch conversation with Barbara seemed very much familiar. We only had lunch for most days of the week back in the day. It was just she and i of course but a couple of years back, Faith would be with us, and so would Art, and so with Alan, and maybe Trailer too. Today's lunch was very much retro for me and I would guess for Barbara too. Anyway I went on home after lunch and I was ready for the second part of the day. This being the day after the Management Committee presentation, it's sort of a breathe out day for me and so I just chilled the rest of the afternoon until it was time to pick up Johnnie at school. There is definitely a familiarity with picking him up at STAR and I don't even have to wait for him anymore. A good thing too because we're headed to Lisa's office for the typical Wednesday Spanish class over there. And then of course after the Spanish class, it's dinner with Lisa. While Johnnie did his class, I tried to catch up on my steps in the hallway outside Lisa's office, realizing that I was barely at 20 active minutes and already 5000 steps. I didn't think I would get to 280 active minutes by today, but at least I could try to get as close as possible so i don't have to make it up all at once tomorrow. Johnnie did his class and then Lisa declared she was already done anyway. That WAS a surprise. Apparently she had cancelled her entire afternoon schedule because she had to go to the O/B doctor because she had another yeast infection. <Was it really a visit for yeast infection? I wonder. Hmmm. Then again if it was anything else would it really be any of my business. No I think not LOL> Anyway for dinner Lisa decided to indulge her 'let's just drive around and find the first thing that comes up' mode. And actually we did discover a hole-in-the-wall pizza place on Pico and 26th. And they had some pretty good pizza at that. All of us were definitely full and we took back a bunch of pizza too. And when Johnnie and i got home, we went to the hot tub like I promised him. And he did his sink-or-float game in the hot tub. While I did some static exercises to get my heart rate up and my step count up. And guess what, I ended up with over 12,000 steps. AND I managed to get to 97 active minutes. I don't know quite how I did that. I made it to 284 active minutes this week already! Of course I was pretty tired after all that. This day may have been pretty routine. But I get to do a lot of stuff on this routine kind of day. And I knocked off to sleep when Johnnie did...
