Auto Pilot Thursday But the Wrong Direction

As energized as I felt yesterday, today was the opposite. I did have a nice meditation that started at 4:30 AM in the morning until well past 6 AM. I could feel my hands lose blood flow presumably from slowing down my heart rate. Three were still random thoughts making their way through but I think I got enough quality focus in to make the session meaningful. And from there the morning was pretty routine up until I dropped Johnnie off at school. I made a stop at Mar Vista Park so I could get 10 pull-ups done. But I was so sore I couldn't even complete 1. I labored through one. Stopped. And did another one and realized I was really that sore. Must have been the weight room work at the FRB yesterday. Needless to say I was disappointed. And then later on, when I was watching a BBC clip on how a person can predict his longetivity and life span with one simple exercise. Which is to get down cross-legged from a standing start to sitting down on the floor. And then to get back up from the same position without moving. I got down ok enough. But I had a difficult time getting up. Not without propping myself up with a hand. Once again I was disappointed. I think I did this exercise once before and I had no issues then. I attributed all this disappointment to a general low level of energy today as I said. The trick was what my go-to counter should have been in order to raise my vibration. In order to raise my energy. Because the second I couldn't do what I wanted my vibration dipped. Pretty low in fact. And then my thoughts gave way to FEAR. Fear that I am growing old, that I am losing my physical vitality, fear of disease, fear of getting sick, fear of being sick, fear of dying. FEAR FEAR FEAR. And I was simply way too distracted to simply sit and make sure those fears were addressed. And so THAT is the work I have to do to maintain consistency. Kinda like my golf game. I know what works. Simply gotta do more of same. 

And so I ws on auto-pilot the rest of the day, which wasn't so bad really. At least I got to a lot of the stuff I needed to do for work. Got that HCCN kick-off thing all done which was the most high-visibility thing on my TO DO list because it is part of the strategic plan. Otherwise do ya think I would have paid it much attention? LOL. By late afternoon I focused my attention on getting Johnnie dinner. I wanted to get out and purchase a couple of foldable lawn chairs, simply because we're going to Mar Vista Family Fun night tomorrow night and it is supposed to be picnic style and I wanted us to be able to sit down at least. I found a couple of those chairs at Home Depot for less $13. But of course I had to go there to get it. My plan was to go right after I picked up Johnnie. But then I decided we'd eat dinner first and we would eat at home. And so before I picked him up I made him spaghetti and pizza, and made me the cauliflower crust pizza as well. I wanted to try that liquid mozzarella cheese I just got too. And so everything was done and out of the oven by the time I got Johnnie. And he had finished dinner well before 6 PM. As did I. The mozzarella cheese stuff turned out pretty good actually. I even tried it on an egg wrap with some of that turkey meat. Kind of a modified quesadilla if you will LOL. And then we headed out to Home Depot Marina del Rey. See pic of Johnnie with a stack of paper towels. I forgot they had a ton of cleaning supplies here. Better than TARGET actually. I had another memory blip while walking through the aisles. I remembered purchasing the battery powered weed whacker for the backyard grass back in the day. I wonder what I would have done now that there is a water allocation thing going on in LA. Go to a waterless lawn LOL LOL. No comments on how Lisa's backyard is turning out. Anyway we got home well before Lisa called to pick up Johnnie. Because she didn't call until 8 PM actually. She was in Pasadena hanging out with Sacko and her mom. That was ok. I drove Johnnie and the dog to Lisa's house close to 9 PM. Even gave him a shower. Lisa got home around 9:15. I thought I'd squeeze as much time as I could since I wouldn't be seeing Johnnie this weekend. Another Thursday hand-off. I went home with thoughts that the short Memorial Day week is almost done :)