Starting To Check Out

It's only Tuesday and I'm already thinking to myself why am I even working this week? Especially when I have Johnnie in the house all day, starting his winter break. Here is where I couldn't help but think that if I were already retired or working for someone only if I felt like it then he and I would probably be spending the day doing something out of the house for sure. As it was since I didn't really think of anything and since I actually did have to work today I figured we'd just try to replicate his usual day. That meant starting at McDonald's for breakfast although I did not wake him up early today. I just let him sleep in and so we got an unusually later start. As in almost 8 AM. Which was still pretty early. Actually. He did his videos on his iPad, and then I got him started on Prodigy. I made him do Math AND English exercises since he really hasn't gotten 5/5 much in his English and punctuation exercises from school. If there is a chink in his armor, that would be it. And so I made him go at it for a good hour and a half, checking in on him time and time again while I also caught up on my emails and such. I noticed we had a Roadshow planning meeting right after lunch. Is it time for that again already <sigh> and then of course I had my IS Team Meeting, and I note to myself that maybe I shouldn't try too hard to be an asshole this time LOL. Anyway we made it to lunchtime and Johnnie had macaroni-and-cheese Arnel style. And dad had tuna sandwich and tomato soup. And then I had him do some Art using all those paint materials we had bought some time ago. It kept him occupied through most of the early afternoon in fact. Enough so I could go through my 2 meetings without interruption really.  It was good that I get to spend all day with him considering I'm dropping him off later on at Lisa's to spend the night. Since I have to be at the FRB for most of the day tomorrow, I figured she could keep him at the office and I could pick him up in the afternoon. We had talked about it already and Lisa was all too glad to see Johnnie again tonight.

I don't think Johnnie was too bored today. I know it wasn't like yesterday when apparently he had spent most of the day with Brooklyn at her grandmother's house. The only counter move I had was that I let Johnnie watch his usual slate of videos starting at 3 PM. Ok maybe he was a little bored towards the evening. You can see he's in that mode when he starts digging into his toys and starts building stuff LOL. I looked at last year's journal entries to see what I was doing with him. Almost exactly a year ago I had taken him to the QueensCare health fair and then we went home to the infamous vomiting episode at Jack-in-the-Box, which Johnnie still reminds me to this day to pay attention when he says he's feeling sick. And then I noticed entries where Lisa was bugging me about something or other, culminating in that angry episode on Christmas Eve. That was probably me pushing out my own irritation that had built up over the week. Something to watch out for this week eh? Anyway Johnnie was spending time with me building stuff all over the apartment then too LOL LOL. Tonight I was simply trying to run out the clock, which was to let him watch whatever he wanted until it was time to clean up. The deal was that I was supposed to drop Johnnie off bed-ready. He was to be showered already and his teeth brushed. I was ok with all that. And by the time I had dropped him off, it was already 9:30 and it was for sure time for him to go to bed anyway. Lisa was already in bed, working on her computer. I felt a pang in my insides when I left to go home, as if I really REALLY did not want to do this after all. But I had no other option. I knew it would bug me to go home early in the week and be alone. It was so against the usual routine. Worse was that usually I get a really good night's sleep when Johnnie is around because I get to go to bed early myself. When he's not around, not so much. That's ok. I just let myself slink on the couch and tried to clear my head enough to go to sleep. I miss my Little Bug already.