Changing Karma

It was exactly a year ago that I drove down to San Diego on Christmas Eve to have dinner with my family. It was a last second decision caused by a major blow-up by Lisa. So bad, that it literally threw me off in every way possible. I immediately called off being at Christmas dinner at the Elams the following day and I couldn't get back to balance for almost a week. As far as Lisa's blow-ups with me went it was one of the worst. So much so here I am still remembering the emotional fallout a year later. And so I felt it was important to undo the karma of that day a year later. How do I do that? By spending the day with Lisa and Johnnie and making sure I do not get provoked into an emotional reaction of any kind. We discussed today actually and Lisa simply wanted to write up 4 day worth of notes she claimed.  And so I readied up by doing my meditation, doing my emotional clearing, and then even having breakfast so I am not dependent on whatever Lisa had in her fridge. I laugh at the thought because that was exactly what provoked her last year. She wanted stay in and eat lunch. And make some leftover shit that was in her fridge. Lisa being Lisa. I'm sure she's going to do more of the same today. I just had to be prepared for it is all. When I got there mom and son weren't even out of bed yet. And Johnnie already declared he was staying with mom. If anything, that kid sure sticks to routine. I didn't care really since I had already eaten breakfast. But even after Lisa got up, she insisted that I eat an egg at least and have some tea. Something about not accepting the food she offers really offends her. It's like she feels personally rejected BIG TIME. This morning I ate the egg, had Earl Grey hot tea and prepared to stay as long as possible, even for the entire day if I had to. I was determined to have a different day today than I did last year.  And so first we started opening presents. Johnnie of course had dozens of them already. And he hasn't even gotten some of them yet. Heck there is something waiting for him in the package room in the apartment as we speak. Of course there were a couple of games too. And we played a variation of the Tic Tac Toe game that was a lot ore strategic. Impressively, I didn't beat Johnnie even when I was trying. The kid has an innate talent for strategy I will give him that. He'd probably be good at chess.  And then finally Lisa started working her notes while Johnnie and I continued to play on his new games. If you would have told me I'd be spending the morning playing Pokemon. board games with Johnnie I would not have believed you.

The morning went by quickly and then before we knew it it was already time to think about lunch. Here was a focal point. Lisa had leftovers from last night of course and wanted to eat it. At least I cooked it LOL. And then there was some other finger food we could eat. And of course I cooked up some penne for Johnnie to put in his chicken noodle soup broth. We were good to go. And then after lunch Lisa needed a nap. And so I stuck around playing with Johnnie. We sort of invented this game with his building blocks. Him putting it up, me throwing blocks to tear them down. We went on with this game for almost 45 minutes I think. Every once in a while, I would go outside and take steps. 150 here, 200 there. By 2 pM I was already at 5500 steps. Hey just because I'm here hanging around doesn't mean I still couldn't do my steps right? I also took 15 minutes to pick up some shredded chicken nachos from El Pollo Loco. Hey if I'm hanging around, I could at least indulge myself with snacks. It's Christmas Eve after all. And when I got back, Lisa even sent me on an errand to pick up crickets for the gecko. We took that opportunity to pick up some salad stuff from my apartment. Johnnie had it in his mind that he was going to make his mom a salad. Parent's salad he called it. I took that to mean it was something that both his parents were going to eat and enjoy. Though it was only 4 PM, he sure did mean it when he said he was going to prepare it. I mean it did have everything. Mushrooms, beets, pumpkin seeds, tomatoes, carrots, mushrooms. And no dressing. He gave it to his mom and Lisa obliged by eating all of it actually. By 5 PM Lisa had at least finished her notes. And I thought since it was close enough to dinner time that I started venturing in the kitchen and making stuff. Heck Johnnie had been there making the salad anyway and left a big mess LOL. Of course Lisa would find it and make a snide remark. I didn't care. I wasn't going to be triggered today remember? And so it was that I made the rest of her chicken and Johnnie had yet another meal of chicken and rice. Lisa already had her salad and had vegetable soup too, which would have been offered to me had I not had any chicken. That was the key you see, was to have an alternative on the ready. I would go home later on and make myself a veggie pizza. That would have been an alternative too. But as it was we had a nice dinner, I washed Lisa's dishes for the third time today and by the time I left for home, it was already 7:30 PM. I had stayed the ENTIRE day,  and got to spend Christmas Eve with Johnnie, which was something I couldn't do last year. I changed the karma at last. I am looking forward to a peaceful Christmas Day.